Chicken soup for the soul

This is one episode in my life which make me having some long thoughts on how lucky I am
and it did inspires me. A little chicken soup for the soul to share for those mothers who some how still grieving over their lost babies or whoever out there who are still trying to have a grip on their lifes.

I do own a little blogshop online selling beauty and accessories products like most of people out there , just to earn some extra cash and I do enjoy meeting up with customers as well. My business started since 2009 and it continues to grow during my 1st pregnancy. But unfortunately , I have to give up my baby and due to over grief, I have stop my online business for awhile.Till recently, I have decided to pick up my business again.
Customers are getting more this time round and I am over thrilled ! One day,there is this lady who has send me email to ask for a beauty product I am selling and ok, I do have immediate stocks for her.In her sms she is very excited by saying yippee, she want to get the items ASAP. So she decided to opt for meet up for the item and that was fine for me as well.
Just before the meet up, she send me a sms ..something like "hey , See you tonight at XXX Mrt control station.... btw when you see a short gal in a wheel chair , that's me ! "

The moment when I see that sms , alot of thoughts came into my mind .... I decided to waive off handling charges for her which I normally charge for others .The next moment , I sms her telling her that. After awhile she reply with sms with appreciation ( I can feel from the sms ).
Our meet up suppose to be 7pm . I was early that evening , reaching 15 mins before the actual time. The control station is over packed with commuters and passer bys. Well, Since I was abit
early, I try to look out for any person which is in wheel chair as she describe.

Unfortunately, she was not there . I keep looking at my time shown on my iphone when it shown 5 mins past 7pm. I started to be abit worried on her...Questions were flashing through my minds .Was she caught in a Jam or was there anything happening or she decided not to meet up last min ? I decided to sms her which I normally did for customers who are late.

Less than a min, I received a blinking message apologizing that she was a bit late ...asking me to wait for a little while. After seeing that, I feel more relieved making sure she was safe during the journey.And also abit remorsed,hey can't I just have some patient on people who are handicapped ?? While waiting, I walked throughout the control station area, making sure I did not missed her in any secs. Just when I thought, I saw a wheel chair coming out from the exit of the gate.Of course, she don't know I saw her as I did not describe of how my appearance is before. I quickly went up to her , passing through the crowds just to appear in front of her.

On the wheel chair is a young girl which looks like in her teens .Due to some deforms of her legs, she has covered up her legs with her bag laying on.
At that moment, I recall the sms . No wonder she says she is a short girl cos normally people can't see her legs and that's why .....
Her brightest smile I ever seen when I put her ordered items on her wheelchair.

She immediately forked out the exact amount to me. Actually, this is a shocking scene for me and I don't know how to handle .. I just simply say hey , where you stay ? You take good care ok ,bye! She still smiling with acknowlegment.
After that I leave the scene biding good bye to her.

Actually she was staying in woodlands, which is few stations from where we meet up. I felt very very regretted that since I already know she is handicapped, I should have suggested to her at least meet her at woodlands MRT. I went down the escalator and kept looking at the gate entrance whether she has entered and yes, I saw her going through the gate.

I felt very very bad at that moment and I feel I was insensitive by making inconvenience for her. My eyes were red all the way through the crowd. I asked myself how can god be so unfair to a teenage girl like her , how can it be ?? Just went I was out of the building , I got a deep breath and try to control myself , I received a text on my iphone.

It was her ! She sent me a message saying that she feel very thankful for the item and asked me to contact her if I have any new items .See if what can she help me to buy .
This text really broke me to tears. I can never imagine that what happen to her can make her more optimistics than normal people. She is saying what can she help me .....

I apologize to her saying, Im really really sorry to her and will meet up at woodlands for her if next time she is buying anything from me.This is what I can do for her at that moment.
Alot of soul searching for me the next few days . In the past, I always complain in life, why am I given this treatment, why I do not have a great job, why I have to go through break up with boyfriend, why this , why that.

Trust god, he has his own reason. Everyone is given a task to accomplish don't always feel that life owe you something. The paths that each and everyone of us are different , after walking through them , you will start to appreciate .Yes, sometimes life break us ,BUT it nurtures us to make us stronger also. This is what I got the answer from the little incident.

Mothers who have lost their little ones , like myself, Please pull ourselves together.
Don't bury ourselves in sollows for long, or else sun will never shine on our side.
Do things that inspires you: go for a movie, join fan club , Open a small blogshop to keep you busy for a little while , have a sharing moments with our husband , go for donation , read a self enrichment book, do handicrafts ( maybe for our future little ones ) and that's what I am doing it now : ) , eat well , sleep well ....You see, there's so many things we can do !Sooner later, I hope you will have a little joy of bundle yourself and became a better person.